Some are ... Some aren't

Summer is here again, bringing along with its hot and sticky weather memories of old miserable summers. Summers of Monsoons. Summers of mosquito bites. Summers spent fantasizing about cool European destinations. Summers of failed attempts of getting a golden glow. Summers of broken friendships. And broken hearts. Summers of weddings and all the drama that comes with that.


Yet as always, this summer seems to be the worst of them all.

I met a good friend of mine a few days ago who confided in me her horrible story.

A couple of months ago she got in touch with one of her old school friends. It started off as just getting to know each other again. And now it turned into a proper relationship; honey bunny and all!!!

This would have been fine as it is, if both the people in this scenario were not married! She has been married less than two years ago and he is a father of three.


My friend reassures me that she would never take this any further than where they are right now; regular phone calls and coffee dates once in a while.


What disappointed me the most was the lack of stigma! She hardly showed any signs of remorse. Now I wont pretend that this is the first time I get to hear about a cheating wife as appose to the more common stereotypical cheating husband. But hearing it first hand from someone I know and trust was unsettling.

What justifies infidelity? Why is our culture accepting extra marital affairs? Is a neglecting husband an excuse? Is an unsympathetic wife enough of a reason to get into another relationship?

Later that day, as if on cue, I came across the following:

" Today, the cultural message is that affairs are not so much a matter of character, but more a matter of circumstance. This line of thinking puts the blame squarely on the relationship- and the burden often on the non cheating partner. " - Jillian Straus, Unhooked Generation.

This applies to my friend's story. To her, she didn't do anything wrong. It was her husband who drove her to another man's arms (or ears in her case as they mostly talk on the phone)

But does this make infidelity OK? Does this make me judgmental? I wouldn't know. What I know for sure is that I have never been more scared of commitment.